Stories about Me

What articles and hues have you surrounded yourself with at home, at work? Is there a special article you want close to you, on your desk, in your pocket? What story do these things tell about you, about what you’re going through, about your place in your journey?

I am sitting at my desk, at home, headphones plugged into my laptop, listening to the music of nature and water sounds, piped into my ears. I sit in quiet contemplation as I allow the pen to guide me across the page. In this place of reverie, I can allow my mind to float on the waves of the oceans, the sound of the streams, the birds calling, singing, making their presence known, adding to the magic of it all, making me stay focused in the present moment. I can pretend here. I can sit under a warm sun, look out across the ocean, walk down the sandy beaches, stroll through an ancient forest or travel through the mountains, imagining climbing into their arms, held close and protected by their majestic stature.

I float in and out of those places as I write and let the music carry me wherever I need to go. I have cleared a spot where my journal sits in front of me but the rest of my desk has somehow once again been taken over by the various necessities of life that, no matter how hard I try, eventually they accumulate around me.

To my left there’s a stack of seven books and beside that pile a lined writing pad to make notes, an e-book I printed about journaling opened to the place where I left off the evening before. On top of the journaling book is a book from the library called “When Children Grieve,” that I’ve been going over while helping my youngest client deal with her loses. My plate with a piece of peanut butter toast, the last bit of my breakfast I could not get down, sits on top that book with my computer glasses sitting next to it. My red Chinese tea cup given to me by my sister at Christmas stands guard like a soldier as if in fear that someone will enter the room and snatch my discarded breakfast away.

Three other books are close to me. Two I read in every morning and one thin one I use to lean my wrist on as I make entries on the thicker side of my journal. In the back of those there’s a black cup full of various pens and pencils and of course a retractable back scratcher, the handiest little device ever, made by my son-in-law. There’s also a matching holder that I can use to hold papers, books or journals that I am typing from, my desk lamp, my business phone and of course my laptop computer.

To the right of me, on the shelf below my desk top are my talisman pieces, nurturing connecting pieces that I’ve gathered over time. Two Willow Tree statue collections, given to me by my daughter, one of two women standing together holding each other close. The other one, called “wisdom,” is of a woman or young girl sitting on a stump reading. Surrounding those two statues are four different stones. There’s one with the word “Trust,” one with “Believe,” one with “Faith,’ and the fourth one with a spiral design on it which also represents wisdom, or for me, “Inner Pathways.”

The shelf just below the top one also has a Willow Tree collection piece. This one is called “True Friends” and it is of two girls sitting across from each other, intent on what each one has to say, listening and just being with each other. The second statue on that shelf is my most prized one. It’s the first statue my daughter ever did when I brought home a lump of clay one day. It’s of a woman holding a newborn child in her arms. Hoof! That brings immediate tears to my eyes as I think of what that represents and what her and her husband are going through right now trying to start a family.

In front of those two sits a beautiful hand crafted bowl from Mexico filled with sea shells I picked on the sea shore while I was there in January, walking on the sandy beach, listening to the sound of the ocean and of the birds flying above or poking around in the sand, singing, just like I am listening to right now, only sitting at my desk with music piped in from my laptop imagining……….

But what about the story? What story does all this tell about me, about who I am, about my journey? Books, journals, writing, thoughts, words, people, closeness, creation, nature, trees, rocks, shells, communication, connection, intimacy, truth, companionship, family, contemplation, water, listening, hearing, all of this and more is what defines me. The words Inner Pathways, Trust, Faith, Believe they have been my journey in this life time. The path I’ve travelled and continue to travel. To trust to believe, to have faith and to take inner pathways to get to a place where I can walk the path without stumbling, has been, and continues to be, my journey.

A quote I read grabbed my attention this morning. “Do not carry the burden of the past: do not live in the future. The only important thing is that one lives in the present authentically and fully. Whatever your current life is, be the most you can be by living in the moment.” Chan Chih