This quote struck home for me this morning. I am still trying to get my footing from being jarred by a few of life’s realities that cropped up for me this week. I’ve been feeling at loose ends trying to gather the shattered pieces and make sense of them but life and how it transpires doesn’t always make perfect sense, does it?
The warning to never mix business with pleasure or to start a business with a friend is something I might have been wise to pay more attention to. Not that sharing an office is the same as sharing a business but there are some overlapping, unspoken, rules of conduct that one adheres to out of common courtesy, isn’t there?
I mean there are some things that just aren’t kosher to me even if things were never written in black and white and signed on the dotted line. Good gawd! It throws me for a loop when common courtesy slips out the door and like smoke from a fire, quickly permeates everywhere. I don’t do well in that shit. I choke. I lose all sense of direction and I don’t know what to do or where to go anymore.
I feel myself drifting away from my center and I don’t like it. I keep trying to pull myself back. To apply what I know but the hurt wants to suck me back in. I’m dancing between two fires. Doing the splits between seeing this new development as “a teacher, a messenger from the unconscious” as the quote says, and needing more time to sit in my corner and lick my wounds while holding on to my “how this event transpired wasn’t right” stance.
I’m still feeling rather raw around this office deal and what I’m realizing is it’s not so much the disappointment it creates around the office situation as much as the disappointment in the personal relationship involved. It makes me see that it’s “relationship” that is always more important to me than anything else and it’s the disrespect or disregard for such that pulls my chain in the wrong direction.
“Wake up your soul to this possibility, and you will look with new eyes at your life,” is what the second part of the quote says. Now, I have to pay attention to that. My tag line on my website says, “Discover the Power of Possibility” because that’s what I believe in – the power of possibility. What would the power of possibility be in this case? What is the messenger from the unconscious here to tell me?
Maybe it’s to feel how my own light gets scrambled and chaotic when smoke comes rolling in and blurs my vision. Maybe, it’s to find my own balance with the two most important things to me – truth and authenticity. Maybe it’s to make me even more aware of just how important these two things are to me and how I cannot and will not compromise this for myself. This is what allows the smoke to clear from my vision and allows me to look with new eyes at my life.
1 comment:
Can only imagine what happened but I think it must have had something to do with not respecting your privacy. That's a huge deal breaker in my book. I'd be severing the relationship, if I were you. That's just me. It makes my blood boil just thinking about it.
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