Contemplations & Celebrations

I am done! I am done! I am done! Done! Done! Done! That’s the tune I’ve been singing for the past 24 hours. Yahoo! I did it! I did it! Just got the results this morning and I landed an 83%. I’m pretty happy with that since the course was mega work and the mid-term and the final exam had me sweating all the way through. That’s one down. There’s two more to go to get my degree and I have to wonder if I’ll see my way through them because right now all I want to say is, “enough already!”

But, I went ahead and ordered the $100.00 textbook which goes with the next course and when it comes in I’ll likely feel so guilty for paying that kind of money for a book that I’ll likely go ahead and spend another $400.00 to register for the course itself. This even though there were many times in last 8 weeks, when I popped my head out from underneath my 20 pound textbook and my writing assignments and I’d ask my partner, “Would you please remind me why I’m doing this.”

On another note, I visited Mom yesterday, she was confused and she barely opened her eyes all the time I was there. I fed her dinner while she hung on to her glass of water and sipped water through a straw in between the spoonfuls I deposited in her mouth. It was only when desert time came around and it was her favourite lemon pudding that I managed to have her open her eyes and grab the spoon herself for the first half of it anyway.

Most times it’s very difficult to hold a conversation with her. There’s not much to go on beyond the answers I might get to the standard questions of, how are you feeling, did you sleep well, are you tired and are you warm enough? Some days are better than others and I can talk about stuff happening in our lives or look at a magazine or photo album with her to generate some conversation of some kind. Other days, I can only sit with her and care for her.

Apart from that, I’m still working like mad on this marketing stuff, web site revamping, business cards, planning of future projects and potential possibilities but so far it’s been a money-out and no money-in kind of situation. Hopefully that will turn around soon otherwise I might find myself chewing on those expensive textbooks when I get hungry. It’s a little nerve raking sometimes and I think a regular pay check job would be a lot more reassuring.

However, I did get a promising venture which I jumped up and down about and said YES! YES! Bring it on! I landed a contact with First Nations in Westbank to give them two six week writing workshops back to back. This means for the next 12 weeks, every Monday night I will be getting paid for doing what I love doing. Yep, couldn’t get much sweeter than that. Oh, wait, there’s more. They had so much interest they had to turn some away so they are talking about having me do more in the fall.

So today, I am going to go do some “dig in the dirt”, “work in the yard” kind of therapy and when my old bones start creaking and begging for mercy maybe I’ll pack up a lunch and head out to Bear Creek Provincial Park. There’s nothing like sitting in nature, by a creek with a journal in hand to make things right and to celebrate. And I can always find something to celebrate!